At some point in the day, week, month, year, we all have limiting beliefs or thoughts that cross our minds. This can happen consciously or unconsciously, but they do happen. These can hold us back from reaching a goal or even our full potential because they essentially limit us. We are telling ourselves that there is a reason why we can’t achieve something, rather than reminding ourselves that anything is possible in the future.
What are some of the common thoughts / limiting beliefs we hear from clients?
1 – “I am not good enough to do or be that.” This usually happens when people are struggling with promotions, believing they don’t have the education or physical abilities to do something, to feeling like they are failing at work or in their relationships. Sometimes this comes from trauma in the past and others times it may come from how they grew up and what values the family had. We are here to tell you one thing…YOU ARE GOOD ENOUGH to do or be what you want to be.
2 – “That scares me.” Fear is a huge limiting belief for almost every person. Perhaps we don’t go sky diving because we fear the parachute won’t open. Perhaps we fear spiders and all their legs and eyes. Or even perhaps we fear the unknown in our ever changing and seemingly crazy world. However, there are ways to overcome fears. One of my favourite books on this is actually titled Feel The Fear and Do It Anyway by Susan Jeffers. Fear can stop us in our tracks no matter what level of fear it is or if it is even actually something that can come to fruition. You can build the courage to face your fears…trust me I know. I held a tarantula a few years ago after having years where I could not even go into the same room as a caged tarantula. Do I love spiders? Nope. But this lesson of holding the tarantula taught me that they can be soft and gentle (and surprisingly light).
3 – “I don’t deserve abc.” Yes you do! You deserve to be happy, have a great job, be promoted, own a home, or whatever else you say you don’t deserve. When we tell ourselves this statement, we are telling our future self that we will never have what we believe we don’t deserve, no matter how much we truly want it. Change the narrative. “I do deserve abc.”
4 – “I don’t have enough xyz.” What was your xyz? Most times it is money. I can’t do abc because of I don’t have enough money or time or (fill in the blank). However, it is possible to change this narrative too and remind your brain that you do have enough just maybe not YET. Here’s how to change this sentence – “I don’t have enough xyz YET.” Adding this simple word tells our brain that it is still possible, just not today. Maybe you need to get a job that pays more. Perhaps you need some time management skills. Whatever you don’t have enough of YET, know that planning is a great way to get what you need.
5 – “I am who I am, and I can’t change that.” This is a belief we hear often. We can absolutely change who we are if needed. If we want to go from serving burgers to being an accountant, there is aways a way and you can change that. Perhaps it is going back to school part time, or reaching out to us for career coaching to build your goal to help it come to fruition. The only person who can change ourselves is us. We can update our values as we grow and learn, if we choose to do so. It is up to us.
The first step in overcoming our limiting beliefs is to identify them. A coach is a great way to discover what is stopping you from moving forward, as we listen for key words or phrases where you may be holding yourself back, then we challenge these beliefs. When you cultivate a growth mindset and a belief in the future that things are possible, you can unlock your full potential and work at creating the path forward you truly want to take.
Our action for you: if there was nothing limiting you (money, belief in your abilities, education, etc.) what would you do or be in 5-10 years? Remember, there is nothing in your way, so truly dig into what it is you want or want to be. Once that vision is clear, we want you to determine a tiny step you can take this week to get you started on creating a path to get you there, without allowing your limiting beliefs to stop you. For example, if your big goal is that dream trip to Europe you believe you won’t have the funds for, perhaps your goal is to put just $10 aside each week to start saving. $10 is not a lot of money and if you fear not having that $10 then we challenge you to cut something by $10 a week. Buy coffee a few times a week? Make your own and you can easily save $10 per week.
I created a bucket list years ago and thought nothing would ever be crossed off my 20 or so items. Did you know that she has now crossed off almost 10 items already? On a bucket list! Barb? Well, she lost 40 lbs because she found ways to enjoy all her favourite flavours in a more nutritional way. All because we both enlisted the help of our coaches to help them overcome our own limiting beliefs (yes, us coaches need help too!).
Need help or not sure what is holding you back? That is where we, as coaches, come in as we are here to help you along your journey or even to your ultimate 5-10 or future year goal.
info@twinlifecoaching.ca www.twinlifecoaching.ca
Remember, You’ve Got This!
Written by: Tara Lehman
Image from Microsoft Stock Images